Why chasing happiness is making you unhappy


I found this post on AllThingsWellness blog… my comments below.

I could not agree more! The arrival fallacy is a solid theory, and I have personal experience with it in my personal and professional life. Setting more realistic goals and expectations, preferably with a well-thought out plan to get there, is one way to avoid disappointment. I would add that it is important to think about the expected outcome. What will success look like?


Acronyms—netiquette—urban dictionary—GIFs

I pride myself on being technologically savvy, up to date, and cool (the urban dictionary actually endorses this word because it is very “conveniant” [sic]). I wonder if [sic] is outdated?

So why is it so difficult for me to communicate (translated “stay out of hot water”) with millennials?

This is not a complaint (remember the ground rules set yesterday?).  Rather, it is an observation.  There are all these new social rules and someone seriously needs to write a book or start a blog on intergenerational communication in 2018.  Here is what I have learned so far …

Apparently, I have a RBF.  When I googled it, I found out it meant that person thinks I have a resting b*#ch face.  I was crushed, whisked back to that elementary school playground. No matter how many times they assured me it wasn’t a bad thing…  I mean, can you imagine telling your parent, grandparent, boss that they have an RBF?  But it isn’t a negative thing..  LOL, but not ROFL because that’s just done, outdated, or not popular on vine.

Some time ago, I learned that not responding to a PM or text is one of several communication cardinal sins.  Apparently, millennials will pardon our less-than-instant response, but we must respond within a few hours.  I also learned that there should be a definitive end to the conversation.  For example, “Are you coming over for dinner?” “Yes”. Is a no go.  This example breaks two rules.  First, there is no closure to this conversation.  Second, thou shalt not respond in short sentences!  I never knew this, but you are obviously angry or upset with someone if you make short responses.  Huh.  So much for brevity or not having much to say for no particular reason. So, I find myself adding words simply to avoid the appearance that I am upset.  Sometimes, I cheat.  I use a chain of GIFs to convey my feelings.  (A very valuable lesson here—never send a GIF that contains anything you do not know or understand!)

I have also learned that grandparents must monitor all social media if they hope to be kept in the loop on grandbaby’s progress.  The emphasis is on ALL social media.  Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram are not enough!  Can you guess which app I forgot?  (And save us all the embarrassment, MySpace is for dinosaurs). So no more special or private revelations—everyone learns together.

So, the very thing that keeps me in touch with my loved ones, friends old and new, and even some people I don’t even know, is bittersweet.  I can see and talk with my grandchildren that live far away.  I do not have to worry at all about the cost, no minutes, long distance, or data limits.  We can communicate freely and often with no restrictions.  But with change must come some learning and adaptation.  So please be patient out there, give each other the benefit of the doubt.  Trust that all parties are doing their best.  And please, please could someone create a cheat sheet PDQ?


Oh the fun times we will have…

I am so happy that you decided to join me.  I promise you that this blog will be eclectic, creative, and honest. Who knows where each day will take us?  I want to share, learn, cry, and laugh with whoever is brave enough to weather the highs and lows with me.

The concept for this blog came to me one day when I was feeling about as isolated as I ever want to feel again.  You should know, I am a very complex person. I can be quite serious but equally silly.  I have an abundance of professional experience and college debt (a Freudian slip there, I meant to say education). I live on a 59 acre farm in rural Northeastern Pennsylvania with my husband.  Together, we have four amazing adult sons, 2.5 beautiful daughters-in-law, and four grandchildren (number five is due next month).  This area is beautiful and peaceful, with one drawback—there are very few jobs.

So, I am trying to make a go of blogging, writing product and book reviews, articles and books, growing Christmas trees, selling my art, and finding honest and decent people for inspiration and good company.  This is the start of what I hope will be a wonderful and positive experience.  I have always favored stories of human perseverance and triumph, so this will not be a platform for me or any followers to wallow in self pity, whine or complain.  Here I will mention that I have several disabling conditions (multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia, Lyme disease, and lots and lots of arthritis), but I choose to follow my youngest son’s advice which was “keep on striving, pushing your limits and now know that you are doing these things despite those issues”.  My hope is that we can inspire one another, lead by example, and always move forward.

Each day, I will share something positive with you.  Maybe it will be a reflection on something learned or experienced, a funny story, a request for ideas, a how-to tutorial, or plans for the future.  I will always be open to sharing your positive stories  and ideas on this blog, but only with your permission.  As for the part about crying together, I hope it is obvious that I meant tears of joy or tears that spring up from an overwhelming sense of pride or amazement.

There is so much pain, violence, and hatred in this world, we all need, I need, more positivity, hope, and joy.  Let’s go then, let’s walk together and choose to see what is uplifting and admirable, despite the world’s “issues”.